A Stay on Contestant’s Row
If you became a fan of “The Price Is Right” after the Bob Barker era, you may have no clue as to what “Contestant’s Row” is. This is the exciting representation of an opportunity to win and not only win, but win big. At any given time during the hour long game show, out of the studio audience, up to nine people bid on items for a chance to hit the stage and engage in a critical thinking game to win more prizes, like an all expense vacation, a new car or furniture for an entire room. Each segment allows four people at a time to stand in “Contestant’s Row,” (aka “Bidder’s Row during the Carey era) for transition to the next phase.
Besides the Price Is Right playing in the house each day, thanks to my Mommy who has always been a fan, hearing the show from my office while working from home got me to thinking about how much life imitates art. It’s no coincidence who ends up on Contestant’s Row. First one must submit the necessary paperwork to get a ticket to the show. Afterwards, those who are invited to the show receive a ticket via email. Then the production staff conducts assessments to determine who will be selected to make it Contestant’s Row. Let’s pause there. Before I begin to express excitement as well as anxiety about making sure that in life one presents (or bids) properly to make it “on stage,” I must express that waiting on God to move is similar to waiting for the tickets to the show to arrive. You may check your inbox, spam, return to the website to make sure that you submitted your information properly - all to be forced to trust the process, yet again. No matter how many “assessments” you believe you’ve endured and successfully rose to the challenge, an additional hoop of getting to the next stage looms large. And then, the characteristics and expressions and enthusiasm that got you to Contestant’s Row must be sustained, even as those around you continue to bid accurately enough to make it on stage. Let’s just say the month of May has felt like an extended stay on Contestant’s Row and maintaining the fortitude to remain joyful, hopeful and trusting did not come by ordinary means.
The last blog I wrote was near the end of April, when the content was about looking like what you’ve been through and I was indeed “looking like I was going through,” not only externally, but more importantly struggling to remind my soul to hope in God. As such, I made a decision to “turn my plate down,” as I sought the hand of God, a deepened reliance and sustainability in His plans and His will - and most importantly perhaps a resolve to whichever path He allowed. Being a parent is hard. Being a parent of an adult is nothing like I ever imagined. If we are afforded the opportunity to know the happenings of our mini adults, we are blessed, but even then it’s like watching them make it on stage to play a game on the show, screaming out the correct answer and them listening to a complete stranger tell them the price of a year’s worth of laundry detergent, when you still purchase it for them. LOL. Not really, but you get the gist. As I navigated my struggle to bridle my tongue, I realized that the most appropriate place to express my fear, my concern, my ideas and my pain, was not to my youngin, but instead, my God. So, I did and here’s what I learned.
First, there are times to remain silent and times to scream in my pillow; and in parenting at this stage, choosing silence is by far a more wise and just decision. When I felt like bursting to say, “What you need to do is….” I chose to take it to Jesus. Soon, it became easier to respond, “Oh okay,” when something was being said or an action performed to which I did not comply. I would just think, “well me and God are going to have a good “keke” about this one. And because I conditioned myself to practice silence, it allowed me to continue to be in the loop as well as position myself to be asked my opinion when it really seemed to matter. You see we can (and have) do all that is humanely possible to get our children to Contestant’s Row, but at some point, it is up to them to either use what God’s given them to make it to the next stage or hangout for a bit longer on the row, until it’s their time. This brings me to my next learning curve - God’s timing is not synonymous with ours. I can hear Daryl Coley’s voice in my head singing,
“Who am I, to question his wisdom (I am nothing)
Who am I, to question God's judgement (I am nothing)
Who am I, to be offended by his ways?
By word He allows to be
I must realize that my God is (sovereign)”
Coming to the realization and the acceptance of the sovereignty of God is not for the weak. Somewhere around week three of May I ceased from saying, “I just don’t know why this is happening,” and instead began to say, “Well this is as much of a faith walk for her as it is for me.” If I believe that God is able to do anything, I must also embrace that His anything may not be what I always desire, but I’ve never not known “His any old thing” to work for my good!!!!!!! So, even in this, or the “this” for you, it is imperative that we give God glory and trust His process even as we feel inept to trace it or dare I say, believe it. Which ushers me to my third learning achievement, incubating joy during the wait. When I watch the Price is Right with my Mommy, I witness the decline in excitement as contestants watch others respond as their bid wins, granting them permission to depart Contestant’s Row. With each passing moment, the originally enthusiastic person celebrates with other gamers while attempting to regulate their own emotions. This is particulalry true when someone outbids them by a dollar. And yet, the cameras are on and one doesn’t want to communicate disappointment, frustration, even anger. While our God doesn’t have us “on screen,” we are on display as His witness in the earth. I am not suggesting that we fake it till we make it, but I am reminding us that “For His Sake and For His Glory,” we can endure as good soldiers. The Word of the Lord declares that the joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10) and so may we find joy in the wait by serving others, by worship, by praise, by reading His Word, by reminding ourselves of the faithfulness of God and how He’s ushered victory in our lives and those we love amidst insurmountable circumstances.
It’s June and we are still in Contestant’s Row, waiting for the move of God. However, I am more encouraged than I was six weeks ago. I am seeing the orchestration of God and it is marvelous in my sight. I humble myself to receive all that’s He’s planned and I thank Him for parenting me as I parent her. Contestant’s Row is not always easy but it’s necessary; and for that I’m grateful.